Operation Butt-Out has had it’s set backs. Mark’s messed with us… twice now? Yeah, but we’ve got him nailed.
And… sometimes I wish we didn’t.
First, we had to go to this barbeque some of the Suits were hosting on Memorial Day. At least there were no cameras around, and we thought it was a nice break on our way there -- but later on I was practically on my
knees thanking God or… whatever’s up there for giving us the day off.
It all started nice and normal. The host’s wife (I so cannot remember her name) was hugging me for a while, saying how cute she thought Oli and I are. I like being cute, but not really Snuggles the Bear cute. This went on for a few hours.
Then there was this huge commotion when Sasha punched Isaac Hudsoner… son. I don’t really know who he is, but according to the gossip that ensued for a whole hour or so afterwards -- he was trying to hit on Sasha, and then Sasha
hit him. I wish I had seen it better. That would have been so awesome.
Then I went to grab a burger or whatever, and Dennis is there. We get into this HUGE argument over what is best on a burger. He says onions all the way, and I’m thinking “Eww… no wonder he’s a grease ball!” I personally prefer Swiss cheese, lots of ketchup, and if it’s green enough some lettuce. I usually eat some other cold veggie when I have a burger.
But we’re just about to get to a good fist fight (at least I was) when a crowd runs past. Oli and the host’s kid
fell into the lake while playing catch. And Mark and Sasha had to save them. Jesus, I was so terrified, I didn’t let anyone get near Oli for the rest of the day.
Then we get home and he
collapses. I’m freaking out, trying to remember 911’s number when Mark starts making orders like those people on ER ( You know, the show on the
good network?) and it turns out he’s a doctor! Did the MBC guys plan this or what?
So Oli’s been bedridden for a while, but that’s just HALF of the shit I’m pissed over.
Everyday I’d try to go see him and when I’d open
my own bedroom door Mark would be in my face. “No visitors. Doctor’s orders.” If he were a GOOD doctor, Oli would have been in the hospital! And he even ate ALL our stash of candy.
He did good with not smoking for a while, but then he came home the other night and smelled of smoke. I ran out of there and got Sasha. It was kind of frustrating, because he went off and smoked. But it was fun too because we got to tickle him. He’s really ticklish and almost as much of a rail as I am. After a while, Sasha said he’d buy him some beer or something if he promised to not sneak off and smoke. And he agreed.
So while Sasha was out, we picked a movie -- Interview With the Vampire. When he returned, there was pizza, candy, and Jack Daniels for Mark! He let me have a glass, but I couldn’t finish it. I feel like such a wussy. Anyway, he was
slammered and I had to help him to his room. He insisted that he wanted to type or something, so I helped him into his chair. Before I fell asleep on his bed we was raving about Tom Cruise playing the piano. Not really Tom Cruise, he was raving about LeStat. Mark is weird.
Then yesterday it was just Oli, Mark, and me! We had a great time too! Oliver was feeling well enough to go sit on the living room couch for a while, so we moved out there. Mark was falling apart bad, and then tried to run off to smoke again. Dennis was NOT helping one bit, but I think he’s got a thing for Mark.
Anyway, Sasha got in Mark’s doorway and that’s when Mark went berserk. He
punched Sasha. And it wasn’t some flimsy punch either, I swear I heard Sasha’s jaw pop or something. They BOTH looked kind of stunned for a moment before Sasha had knocked Mark off his feet and he was on the floor. Wow. You just don’t see this kind of shit on the WWF.
We made ANOTHER agreement with Mark. Sasha has to clean up the house and his room in that pink apron! I think that’s great. Dennis called Mark a god there.
I have to cook every meal for him and whenever he gets cravings, etc. This blows because he woke me up at
three in the morning to make him a
sandwich. And not just any sandwich! A PBJ! Really…
He said that he wants Oliver to grow up. Oli doesn’t need to grow up, he’s perfect! But this isn’t the bad part. A whole WEEKEND away from Oli. Oli and Sasha and Mark. In the mountains or on some other place. Camping. Me, back home. Oli-less. With Dennis. I am going to commit suicide.
But yes, Mark woke me up this morning at three. I made his sandwich and he made me sit up and watch Interview with him AGAIN. He kept snickering when LeStat turned Louis into a vampire. Not when he was crying out in pain, but the biting and stuff. Mark has issues.
We just got back from the mall a while ago. He felt really bad about punching Sasha like that and so we went shopping for a gift. He bought him a book… I can’t understand it - it’s in some other language, and a vest. Mark is a terrible shopper. Well, he knows what he likes, but he can’t stand the crowds. We got stuck behind this lady with a carriage and he kept looking at his watch and stomping his foot. He said, “I want to get in and get out. I don’t like the screaming kids.”
That’s about it. Except I’ve been getting harassing e-mails from Kyrene. He’s up to something. I’ll have to keep my eyes peeled.
Excuse me for a moment whilst I gloat~
I have a
BOYFRIEND!
La, la, la -- BOYFRIEND!
It’s been a while, but it’s probably been because I called everyone in my address book. Even KYRENE.
3 AM Monday morning:
“Hello?”
“Kyrene? What are you doing?”
“Dimitri? Do you have any idea what time it is…”
“I sure do~”
“You seem awful cheerful for a bastard on national television…”
“Shut up, I have news!”
“Why should I care? … Okay, what is it?”
“It’s a secret!”
“Ugh… then why are you calling me? Long distance no less..”
“Because my BOYFRIEND is asleep and I got bored.”
“Oh, that’s nice. Why don’t you go -- WHAT?!?!”
“Bye~”So it wasn’t all great and glamorous but who cares? It’s Kyrene. I bet he’ll start watching the show NOW if he hadn’t before. But yes! Oliver is my boyfriend now. Isn’t that great? I’m so happy and excited. But worried too. Not because I might screw up, that’s a given…
It’s the step after this I’m worried about. Well… not ready to talk about it! I’m just living it up right now.
Oh, wow, Oli’s birthday party was… WEIRD. I got him a puppy! He named him Shin and he’s the cutest beagle I have ever seen! I hope he and the ferrets get along all right. Mark and Sasha got him presents too! And we ate in the backyard. It was fun. Then after that we went to the club.
I’ll admit it. I was wasted. I do remember going to the club and Mark bought Oliver and myself some sodas. Poor Oliver must never have been around much alcohol before. After I had a few sips I knew there was something in it, but since Dennis wasn’t there and if I got rowdy with Oliver I knew Mark would hold me back -- so I drank and drank.
I remember this girl came out of NOWHERE and started TOUCHING Oliver. I was so irked. Normally I would have just tapped her on the shoulder and asked “Um… what are you doing?” But no… I clung to Oliver’s arm and almost choked him I’m sure.
She led us to something that I can’t remember, and then this rabid pink bunny with sparkles and… it makes my head hurt. Whatever it was, it had company and I wanted to get Oliver out of there so we could dance.
I know we made it to the dance floor. Mark said he took my car and drove himself and Sasha home. They left us for dead, can you believe it? But at least he took it and not… the rabid pink bunny. Who the hell was that guy? God forbid I ever meet him sober…
The next day was Oli’s actual birthday. I made a really nice meal and that’s when I asked him if he’d be my boyfriend! And he said yes! I’m really happy! I miss him. Sitting here typing… and he’s over there… Sniffle…
Anyway, the MBC Rep guy came to visit last weekend! He brought his kid. Oli and I left after a while to walk Shin. Mark told me later on that Dennis and the Rep’s kid smashed up the upstairs bathroom. But it’s all fine now. They sent some people to fix it AND the front door’s doorknob. Somehow it broke.
My dislike for Dennis is growing by leaps and bounds. The day after he and the little kid smashed the bathroom, he and Mark had their date. Oh! Each month we’re paired off to go on a televised date, which doesn’t sit well with me because… Oliver’s not for anyone else!
They made me drive them to this weird looking pool house and they said to return to pick them up at ten. So I go back up there at five after, and they’re not there so I waited. An hour and half later they come out practically surprised to see me. Bastards… but I don’t hate Mark. Mark’s like a big brother to me!
Speaking of, it’s time for me to start Operation Butt-Out. I’m going to try to get him to quit his habit. I probably should go find Sasha to help me out. He might have some good ideas on how we can gut that nasty habit. Nighty night!